Sha la lala la

When I woke up this morning, I turned my alarm off and rolled over, kept sleeping. When I actually woke up, I thought about rolling over again but it was almost noon so I got up. I took a shower and for some reason it feels as if I'm not waking up at all today. I just want to crawl under the blankies and wubble myself back to sleep.

After curiously wondering what the hell is up now, I realised the new year is making me want to go back to sleep. Even though this year I had to sleep on my brothers couch for months after breaking up with a guy I really liked, I was lazy with school stuff after the summer and I'm still broken, the past year was good.

I made lots of new friends and took a little more control of my own life. I love my little guild and most of my new friends are there. I've also enjoyed the giggly-crush-butterflies once more. I think I don't want to move on to the next year because I don't know what it will bring. I hope for only good things but the pessimist in me is not so sure.

For this new years eve I want to wish you all lots of courage. And when the count down starts, guys, remember this song.

Yo mama!

Again I'm scheming on a little longer post to force on you later but until that is done, you can entertain yourself with some of the trade chats finest. I just found these from my secret logs and thought you might like them:

"Yo mama is so fat chainlighting hits her three times."

"Yo mama is so fat that when I tried to target her the game said "you can only have one target"."

"Yo mama is so fat that when she sits around the house she sits around the house" 

"Yo mama is so fat earth shield wore off before it had a single orbit."

"Yo mama is so fat she gets World Explorer when she logs in." 

 "Roses are red, violets are blue. This joke is so over used and your mom is too."

Another good memory was when my gametime expired in the middle of a random dungeon and it was like a miracle that when I had fumbled myself more time, they hadn't kicked me out yet!

My gametime is expiring in a couple of days again and I thought about taking a little break. I will do so because I want to get some schoolwork done, but reading my old secret logs it states that I can't get any work done without WoW. It's because I end up playing other games that actually requires concentration and it makes me little worried. We'll see how it goes.

I'm no wise man, but I know a few

I have been up all night and all day. I felt like sharing something with you but I'm in no condition to write anything meaningful. That's why this time I let others speak for me.

 

Hope even one of these is meaningful to you too. And if those were not, maybe this last one is.

 

Kids, this is a story of how I didn't meet your father

This time of the year my facebook feed is bursting with complaints of how irritating customers can be. This made me think about the time I used to work in customer service. Memories grow sweeter with time and I'm starting to forget the times I came home and burst in to tears. Or the times I didn't even get home and just cried at the work place.

But what I do remember was this one guy - or should I say a man - who came to the store very often and generally wanted to talk to me and kinda hoovered near my counter. He didn't speak very good Finnish and he had a little boy with him often. The boy was about 5 years old and I assumed he was that mans son. I never saw the guy with a woman so I also assumed he was a single dad.

It was pretty awkward to talk to him and then one time he brought me a pair of earrings. I tried to refuse the gift but he insisted. I think I left the pair under the counter somewhere because they were not to my liking and anyway it would've been too uncomfortable to wear them.

When I started looking back at that moment first I thought I might be little racist and that's why the guy creeped me out so much. But when I thought about it more the occasion reminded me of one episode in How I Met Your Mother where the characters were talking about how sweet gestures are creepy only if the receiver does not like the other one back.

After I broke up with my last long term boyfriend (has it been four/five months now?) more than one guy have contacted me. I'm not sure but from few of them I get the feeling that they have an agenda behind the getting-in-touch-thingey. I'm usually pretty frank myself so this hoovering around subjects gets on to my nerves. Sometimes I feel like yelling to most of the people with penises around me: WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!

Few of my schoolmates and I talked about getting the whole liking or going on a date stuff out of the way and how it might not be the best idea. We talked how it could ruin the anticipation and the wait can actually be thrilling. But I'm not a patient person and I don't appreciate games. At least not that kind of games :)

We are all afraid of rejection and ridicule. But I'm looking for a man who is not afraid of me, and how can a person not be afraid of a hothead like me if he is too afraid of asking me out and seeing me face to face just the two of us?

Which reminds me of this song I usually sing when there's just two people online in the guild.

Now it can play in your head too! You're welcome.

Azerothian nights

I'm so excited! This blog has reached one thousand views! Most of them are probably just bots, but still I can't but feel so flattered and happy.

Thank you all for reading. I hope you have enjoyed reading it as much as I have writing it.

Special thanks to my most avid reader, Rennie. (but seriously, I don't write every day so no need to check that often, silly.)

I'm sorry it's been so little about WoW and so much about my personal life - but then again, who wouldn't like little social porn.

Alone, in the dark

Few days ago I was sitting in the bus and I noticed over half of the passengers were crouching over a light coming from their palms. Made me think what if writing would have been invented now? Would people say reading books in buses and trains destroys all social interactions between the fellow people?

And then I thought about time when reading wasn't common and books were hard to get and I realised why people that knew something knew quite much: They had time to read. Think about the long trips they made back then. Sitting in the cart for hours and hours would give time to read if there was daylight outside.

Back to this time and age. I disagree with the thought smart phones, virtual worlds and all that makes us less social. I think it's quite the opposite. It shows that we do care what's going on in peoples lives, although there is much karma whoring going around too. But people are not so focused on thinking about and memorising equations and plays, but checking up on friends and family or talking to people in other countries. People who chat their bus rides get first hand knowledge about the common mans society, learn about other cultures and see news about ongoing events that affects our society. People are more informed about daily life and maybe not as blind as the one that sits in the bus without the light in his palm.

The one that sits alone in the dark.

I mean, come on. When is the last time you met a Finn that would talk to a stranger?

If you can dream it, you can do it

Last night I had nightmares again. In my dream, I was still with my latest ex and we were trying to get some sleep in our little dream-apartment. Suddenly his mother calls and demands all kinds of things. I don't agree so we go back to sleep. Next thing I know, there's light coming from the mailbox-hole and half of her head pops in from it and she keeps demanding stuff. I get angry and tell her to go away. I lock the door so she can't get in with her set of keys, and I try going back to bed. I could feel through my sleep how angry I was for two things 1) her butting in in our life 2) I didn't get to sleep. The dream-mother-in-law called my boyfriend and demanded to know what was going on and why was our sleep more important than her things. The dream-bf didn't defend my right to sleep and I got so furious I started to throw my clothes and other stuff in a grocery store cart and yelled my lungs out. In the dream I ended up moving out in rage.

I didn't know I had such traumas from his mother but I guess I do since it's the second time I dream about her.

But that wasn't my point here this time. My point is that I can remember being so angry IRL. It's horrible and exciting at the same time. I kinda miss letting my feelings go so loose and just act on them. I haven't broken any plates in years!

I think it's time for me to accept the fact that I am a passionate person, and the person who loves me should accept it too and let me rage from time to time. It's not the end of the world.

In my dreams last night I also couldn't find my apartment and several other stuff happened. The night before I was a female black cop that had to save her daughter from a burning building, but I only had a bike to get there. I should tell you about my dreams one day, because I have a lot of them. And some of them are pretty weird. What would Freud say?

Not for thin skinned

I was hesitant to write about this because obvious reasons, but since it keeps popping up to my head again and again I thought what the hell! I've never been a private person even though I might seem so IRL. So let's talk about se... floorwashing, baby. Let's talk about you and me. Let's talk about all the good things and the bad things.

I'm single, so yes, I think about washing floors with someone quite often. And yes, even girls do that. A lot.

Nothing is more sexy than confidence. But it's not so easy to be confident. In a long relationship when the starting awkwardness is over, it's easier to find the confidence to think oneself sexy. The partner already knows how you look and act half or totally nekkid so you can just go with it. What I've noticed in my new single life, is that thought of washing floors with someone - especially with a stranger - makes me doubt myself. I'm not skinny, I never been and I never will. I accept myself and I even like little things in my figure. But would someone else find my little quirkyness' charming and floorwashable.

Should I tell that person about them beforehand or just let them discover them while washing? Maybe the other person wouldn't even notice them, since they are little things. Or would it be better to just go "yeayea, I know my mop looks a little different than in por... floorwashingmovies" and hope the other person wouldn't be creeped out by it. I know you frown there now, but come on! We all have that one (or two, or three...) thing we are self-conscious about. Has society taught us to cover and change them and not accept them?

My experiences with washing floors are quite limited. The amount of partners I've had can be counted with fingers only. No need to add toes to that. I think they might not have all been very normal way to wash floors either. Few of my ex-partners have had some problems with their... mophandle. Either it's more common than people think or then I've just had weird luck. Anyways, it makes me ponder do I even know how to wash floors like normal people should. Can I dive in and passionately wash dem floors or am I stuck to carefulness and different equipment to help with the washing.

To all moms and dads out there, teach your kids to take care of the mops and handles. I know it's a sensitive subject and it can create awkwardness, but I can't emphasise enough how important it is for a man to be able to perform normally. The cover of the handle should go all the way back. If it doesn't or it hurts, there is a problem.

In worst case the cover has to be surgically removed. It's already been years and I can't remember it so well (goldfish memory, what can you do), but I want to tell you what I remember about it. I was with this guy who couldn't wash floors because the cover was stuck and wouldn't move without anxiety. I went to the doctor with him and after few times there finally was a conclusion that the best way to get normal life was to do a circumcision... for the mop handle. Yeah, totally talking about washing floors.

I remember the moment he walked out of the surgery. I hadn't slept much that night nor eaten. I almost fainted, he was so pale and clearly in drugs and in pain. The car ride home was tricky because he couldn't really wear pants and sitting wasn't the most pleasant position so to say. When we got home, I left him for a moment to run to the drugstore to get the prescription medication even though he wasn't supposed to be alone so shortly after the surgery. And good I did, because he really needed those painkillers.

I have read from the internet stories about guys going back to work the next day like nothing ever happened. I don't know how that is possible, but there are different types of circumcisions so maybe those people had less cover removed. It took weeks before he could start wearing pants like a normal person and even longer to actually move around in them. So there we were, me trying to do the grocery shopping because he couldn't and he doing the cooking because I couldn't. It took months to heal, over a year to be almost normal. And it took even longer getting used to the fact that the mop handle couldn't ever be covered again.

This might sound a rough story, but compared to what could've happened if it wasn't fixed are worse. Washing floors with someone is always nice, but to have a clean and healthy handle is also important. I remember the doctor telling what might happen after years: the cover might strangle the handle and the top end could swell so badly the whole thing would start to look like a mushroom. Not a nice future, am I right? And that was just one example. Much better future for this particular guy was the ability to wash floors more normally - which made me happy of course - and in the end I know he doesn't regret going through the surgery.

If you have any questions, I'd be happy to answer because it's not easy to find information about this from a medical+personal view. Hit me up with e-mail address and I will get back to you.

In conclusion: how ever you choose to wash floors, it doesn't matter how your mop or your handle looks like or do you have a cover or not; the important part is that it works as it is supposed to.

As in you get clean floors. Because that's what they are for.

Washing floors.

Content ever after

This is going to be a single life rant again, so stop reading right now if that doesn't interest you at all.

I'm old-fashioned in the way that I want my men (or well, just one man) to be older than me. I feel like I'm in a horrible age for that though since all the guys over thirty seems so... over thirty. And all the guys few years younger than me mostly seems like boys, not men. It's also getting harder and harder to tell the other persons age, but I guess that's a good thing since it means age difference is starting to mean less and less. But not less enough.

So how to find a person that I could hit it off with perfectly, that would accept me as who I am and I would feel comfortable with, who would be fashionably gentleman but still playing silly games and up for a pillow fight, who could take responsibility but wouldn't be too serious, who would go outside the house and would drag me there too, who would fix a broken furniture but knew I could totally do it myself too, who would love my cooking and my baking but wouldn't mind that it takes me a little while to clean up after me, who I wouldn't kick in the spine in my sleep (yup, done that), who wouldn't drink or smoke (if he smoked, I would end up smoking again too), who would want to marry me and have children with me and I would want the same with him, and so on. How do people find a person who fits almost everything on their "lists"?

Of course some things are more important than others. I don't think I could give up having children for anyone, but maybe I wouldn't have to get married if the other person could show his willing to commit otherwise. And I might be able to learn how to clean after baking if I really had to. Maybe.

I've been told all my life that I judge people too harshly. So I wonder, is this me judging people - or haven't I judged enough before, since none of my relationships have lead to "happily ever after"?

If there even is going to be a happily ever after for me. I sometimes wish I could see into the future and be sure if I get kids or marriage or a life long relationship. I don't think it would kill me if those things wouldn't happen, but it would be much easier if I knew it now so I could be prepared. I think there might be few things I'd choose differently if that was the case.

Would you do things differently if you knew you were going to be alone the rest of your life?

I also keep thinking what's the difference between friendship and relationship. It can't be just the bed-stuff but what else is there. Is there more physical and mental closeness in a love-relationship than in a friendship?

Is there more questions in life than there are answers? Will I lay in my deathbed one day and be all "yay, got all the answers, achievement unlocked, afterlife here I come!"?

50 shades of Carl

I keep having pretty interesting conversations with one of my internetian friends. We've covered almost every part of life already but still the topics don't seem to end. Or well, they are not conversations, more like arguments because my blood pressure always goes waaay up high. But that's me, I take a strong stand on things and then get frustrated if the other person doesn't see my point or agree with me. I do like arguments though. The problem usually is that people don't want to get into those with me because I can be pretty mean and offensive.

But this one guy is different. We can have a heated argument about gay rights for a day and a half and when I'm all "okay I guess we can't be friends anymore, he wont talk to me anymore", he sends me a casual message about something else. It's nice change to talk to someone who doesn't take the arguments too serious. It's not the end of the world if we all don't agree. But it's important to talk about stuff so we can widen our path of thoughts. Like I said before, things tend to have two ends like a good old sausage has (referring to a children's song). It's simply not possible for one person to discover all the aspects to important things alone.

The latest conversation we had was about a piece of news. There has been a case where a German forensic have killed another man and probably eaten parts of him too. Link to the news here. I don't go into more details about that particular subject because my point is elsewhere. My conversation partner thinks a murder is always a murder and should be imprisoned always. He thinks this case was more sickening than a person murdering a stranger on the streets - or at least this is what I've gathered from his arguments. I agree with it being more sick in the light of the both people involved being mentally not in this world. By that I mean the amount of sickness is doubled in this case because both the victim and the murderer are... well, fucked up.

I also think this is less sickening because it seems to me the both parties agreed on the killing and eating. I think people have the right to choose how they live or how they die. At least they should. For both men I think it would've been beneficial to get help and not do this at all, but if someone really wants to be eaten, who am I to judge? Just don't eat me or the people dear to me. I also think we all have weird thoughts and desires from time to time, but do we act on them is a totally different thing. For me it's very interesting to think why would someone act on their weird fantasies.

In the guild chat we sometimes bash mean people and joke about how they should be stabbed 37 times (see reference here). Still, I don't think any of us would actually really ever be able to stab anyone. And maybe joking about it is not the best thing to do. It's all fun and games, but it would be better to tone down those jokes because there's nothing funny in killing someone or death itself. We can still do our get-away-trip to Hong Kong without anyone getting killed in the process.

The question of the day is - and I want you to ponder about this - is there moral grey areas? Is murdering more forgivable sometimes or is it always as reprehensible? Is ending a life worse than getting raped? What is the worst thing that could happen to you and could you ever forgive?

Update

Just couple more days and schools out for this year. And then I have time to actually write. Just couple more days... just couple more... *sleeps*

Storytime!

Some nights we hold a storytime in the guild. Usually it's just me telling about my life in a fairytale form but sometimes the others join in too. It's polite to be quiet and listen to the whole story before commenting. I really love the storytime, so when I found this little treasure when packing my things, I knew I had to translate it to you guys. This is not my work, but I can't find it anywhere else anymore. I'm just so glad I printed it at the time. I'm also glad November is finally over and December is here. Let the snow fall down!

So here's a story of The Monster That Eats Yesterdays:

It's already dark outside, children. Close the curtains and gather around the fire. It's time for the last story of the day. Actually it's not a story, it's something more... Have you ever wonder where all the yesterdays go? Let me tell you.

Every night, at the darkest hour when you're sleeping, the Yesterday-eater crawls out from the murkiest shadow. It doesn't have a visible body, oh no, it is living darkness and it has a humongous maw, and it's maw is filled with the sharpness of winter breeze. Silent, ice cold draught.

Every night, at the darkest hour when you're sleeping, the Yesterday-eater starts to gorge down the yesterday. That is why it's so hard to go back to yesterday. If you ever wake up in the middle of the night, what ever you do, don't open your eyes. If you do, you might see the Yesterday-eater at the end of your bed - and nothing is more horrible than to see your yesterday be eaten by the Yesterday-eater.

In the cities, in some big buildings, there are adults working all night. They have to be extra careful. When the darkest moment of the night is upon them, they can't look behind. Because there, right behind their back, is the Yesterday-eater with it's endless maw silently tearing apart yesterday.

When people get old, they can't live fast anymore. They'll become slow and incautious. And one night the Yesterday-eater will catch them and eat today and all the days to come. That's why so much old people die. They don't have time to live any longer.

This is why mothers and fathers don't have time for you anymore. They are busy working, keeping themselves hurried and tired so the Yesterday-eater wont catch them and so that they would sleep heavily their nights. This is why you have to do as they say and go to bed early so the Yesterday-eater wont be able to find you awake. And when the dark falls, in the corner of your eye if you see something move or if you hear weird noises in the house, you better just squeeze your eyes tightly.

Every night, at the darkest hour when you're sleeping, the Yesterday-eater crawls out from the murkiest shadow. Mom or dad can't help you then.

You are alone in the night.

The end.

Good night.

In the end, does it even matter?

What has happened to compassion?

Has there ever been any?

You know the feeling when you see a person, someone you know, making the most ridiculous decisions of his life and you just want to go over to him and tell him how to fix it? Don't.

"Love me when I deserve it the least, that's when I need it the most."

Lately I've been going crazy with all the noise around me, telling me what to do and how to fix my life. Somehow I ended up being less than everyone else, downgraded to something that is okay to give advice to and to poke, poke, poke, endlessly. The noises keep telling me to live more, work more, study more, take more chances, think more, be more careful, get more money, think less, care less, stress less, work less, study less, be more active, play less, be alone, get a boyfriend. The noises tell me how my next boyfriend should be like and how he should not be like. They tell me where I should get a job and they forget that I can't do everything. They tell me I need more time to myself and I shouldn't rush into anything, that being alone would do me good. At the same time they tell me to go out more, see more people, hook up with this guy and that guy. They tell me I'm crazy for studying so much but at the same time they look down on me if I skip a lecture.

My life, as it is now, apparently is full of endless possibilities to give advice on how to make it better. I didn't know anything was wrong with my life. Or at least nothing I hadn't already thought myself. And the only thing that really has changed lately is that I'm not in a relationship anymore.

When the real life noises goes quiet, the echos still ring in my head. Over and over and over and over again. I should care less. But how? I should think less. But how? I don't know how to shut everything out except for shutting everything out.

"Sometimes the best you can do is just survive."

Here are my advice to you (I can see the irony, no need to point it out): Don't let anyone tell you what to do. Only you know what is best for you. If someone force feeds you advice tell them to piss off. Ask for compassion. Look for a person who will listen to you without judging. And remember, it's okay to ask for help when you need it. But think before you give it without someone asking it first.

In this time and age we care too little. So be out there and care more. Even if it means you'll get burned sometimes, it's still better than the alternative. There should be nothing wrong in caring about others around you.

Best thing you can say to someone: Everything will be alright. You can get through anything. I support you. I care.

And here's my advice to myself: be less scared.

/end of rant

Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the NO!

I thought about saving this for after Christmas, but maybe it fits here too. Maybe. *shrug*

I wrote this on a Friday the 28th of December 2012:

X-mas came, x-mas went.

Hope you all had a merry Christmas!

Christmas is usually the time to think of those who doesn't have anything or anyone. There are lots of posts in the interwebs about people who have helped the unfortunate ones with gifts or money. I really hope they are for real and not just posts for karma.

Christmas truly is the feast for kids. I'm disappointed there aren't any kids in our family, but luckily we are childish instead! Armi and I made a shape of a Christmas tree from some Christmas decorative lights on the wall and put all the presents under it. And opened them all way before x-mas, of course. But I am proud of myself; I opened only one slot of advent calendar per day and not them all at once like usually. Well, not opened, I scratch them since it's a lottery advent calendar. Having one of those is pretty traditional for me. I can remember my father always buying us kids one for each every year even when we were little. I didn't win this year. Again. Next year for sure!

All that lottery stuff is mainly for dreaming. At night, when I have hard time to fall asleep, I imagine what would I do if I won millions of euros. Doesn't matter if I have bought a ticket or not, it still works. Another good choice is to put something on from the TV, like wrestling. Instant sleep guaranteed. Too bad none of these tricks will work when I'm home alone. Every little creak and noises bothers me. The same imagination that can come up with millions in lottery wins, can also imagine robbers and rapists.

It's been so quiet in WoW at x-mas, I decided to go empty my bank account and shop. I bought a new wallet, but the alarm for thieves was left inside it without being deactivated. I also bought a new bag for my laptop and the long handle wasn't in it. Luckily the staff in the next store were understanding about the alarm, but with the bag I need to drag myself back to the place I bought it. I have not much use for a bag that has to be held in hand. It's pretty tiresome to carry a laptop in one hand for long periods of time. Try sometime if you don't believe. But then again, I once said to my mother that once one learns to wipe with the "wrong" hand, nothing can stand in the way anymore.

New year, new tricks... Or the same old. If I'm being honest. 
Happy New Year!

And here's a cute kitten for you. It's fancy. Like me. http://imgur.com/gallery/IFD14

Damn Starks always right

Today when I was walking back to the apartment, I noticed a little puddle on the ground and it's surface was frozen. I had to stop there, in the middle of the street, and poke it with my toes to see how thick the ice was. I don't ever wanna grow old!

This was written on a Tuesday 4th of December 2012:

"Winter surprised the blogger.

Everyone knew days ago it was going to snow soon. And still I was surprised. Autumn turned to midwinter in one night. It's lovely the world is more luminous and it's beautiful outside. The bad thing is it's freezing and slippery outside. I have to break the doctors rule and use the bracer/support-thingey even when not sleeping. If I slip and fall out there, I don't even want to imagine how badly it would end.

This new academic life is giving me grey hair from one thing and then some. Not only the reading for exams and coming up with essays and all that, but the "hands-on" arrangements. They aren't exactly used to students who are not in their best health and so the teachers are puzzled with me. I was given a paper that said I should contact "the services of disabled". With shock I stared at that paper and thought to myself that yeah, I guess I am handicapped. I mean, literally speaking I am disabled. I have a disability and I am a person, so that makes me disabled. I never considered myself as a disabled before. Always thought disabled people with immobilities or extreme mental retardation or something like that. I just have a little booboo. Booboo that makes me suffer through pretty tense pain if I type by hand more than ten words. It's starting to be more clear why this is difficult for the school, isn't it?

I went to the school's doctor to ask for a testimony that I need special planning when it comes to exams. I showed this paper forward and I got that paper to contact the disabled services. I sent them email, but got no answer. I know I should go there and talk to them, but to be honest, I really don't feel like it. The nagging feeling once again to have to go to explain to a stranger what's up. Especially I hate the fact that my handicap doesn't show, so I have to have dozen papers to prove there's something wrong with me and I have the right to have special treatment. I hate that. I wish I was like everyone else. I wish I didn't always have to emphasise my problems. I wish I didn't have to explain and prove. I wish I didn't get labelled as difficult and different. But I guess this is a thing hard to understand if one hasn't had similar experiences.

Good thing is that as a student I get steadily a little bit of money every month and I don't have to fight over it in government offices. I think it's better to get little that is certain than lots with fighting and uncertainty. And I can't say I lack anything, I have roof over my head and food in the fridge, sometimes I can even afford something extra.

With extra I mean things like this electronic cigarette thing I've got exited about. Five weeks ago I quit smoking real cigarettes and after that I've only puffed my e-cig. I still use nicotine in that machine, but my priority is to get rid of smoke and the habit first. I also use nicotine-free liquids to help me get rid of the bad habit. I am confident that one day I don't need that nicotine filled liquid either and the whole puffing will feel so silly, I give that up too.

This has been the best help to quit. No doubt. I've tried patches, inhalers, tried quitting easily, tried  quitting cold turkey, but nothing worked. I have to point out that day five weeks ago was first day on this millennium I didn't smoke. And I'm damn proud of it. But this whole thing divides opinions in my friend circles. Mostly those who doesn't smoke themselves don't think I've quit. Those, in the other hand who do smoke, shares my joy of quitting.

I wish people could support more those who are trying to quit. I think one can achieve much more with honey than a whip. In the future I hope to tell more about my e-cig experiences but now I have to go farm my field for motes of harmony! :)"

One year later and I haven't smoked any real cigarettes. I still have some nicotine in my e-cig but I'm hoping next year that will end too. One of the doctors I've seen said that smoking could be part of my problem because it effects the joints and the bones and something like that. So, it's better not to smoke at all even though the damage might already be done.

(Just right now as I was writing this I heard a weird noise coming from the other room. Like a demonic whisper or something like that. There's no one else here. I'm scared. Hold me!)

The age of innocence

Things that always fascinates me in the virtual world are the relationships. I already talked about like, love and flirting, but this time I'd like to go deeper into relationships.

I chatted briefly with Foss about virtual friendships and the lack of physical closeness. It's a topic that doesn't involve only love affairs but any kind of mutual liking. Can you be close to a person that's only pixels? Can you be involved with someones life if you can't hold him, hug him, truly smile at him or wipe his tears away? (I say him because there's only one word for genders in Finnish and I don't see the point on doing all that he/she -crap.) Is a relationship deeper when you can see the other person, for example through video chat?

Are we blind or deaf in the virtual worlds? Is there something missing?

My opinion in the matter is based on two things:

One is that I'm not a very touchyfeelykind of a person. I don't really like to be touched and the people I let touch me are privileged in my eyes. If I have to hug a random relative or a total stranger, I feel very uncomfortable. When I hug my friends, I usually do it for them, not for me. My close family were never the touchy kind and we express love mostly by sarcasm. One who doesn't understand our way of making fun of each other, doesn't see the deep feelings we have, the closeness and the warmth. I didn't learn to touch people around me as a kid and I didn't learn it as an adult either. I'm not saying I don't like laying on the couch watching a movie in someones warm embrace, but I don't grave it.

The other thing is that I've always had the words on my fingertips. Writing in foreign language makes it more difficult, but for me expressing myself in written words has never been an obstacle. I used to write stories and poems (they were mostly rubbish, btw.) and still sometimes I entertain my guildies by "storytime" as we like to call it. I tell you more about storytime later. I think one can express emotions through text as in spoken words too, it's not a big difference. You just have to know how to "listen".

To make any kind of a relationship work in the interwebs requires understanding and a gut feeling. The other person makes a lot of typoes? Maybe he is tired. He doesn't answer you with long sentences? He might want to be left alone. He says something, that's almost hidden and quiet, in a subordinate clause? Pay attention to those, he might say more than he writes. Ask questions. Because you can't see the other person and you might not know his tone of voice, you have to ask. I can't emphasise this asking thing enough. Don't let yourself be blind or in the dark with the others, open your virtual mouth and write a question. "What do you mean by that?" "I'm sorry, I don't really understand, can you make it more clear for me?" You can pick up on moods through text especially if you chat with that person often.

I think a relationship in the virtual world can function just like any other in the "real world" if you want and you are satisfied with it. If you need hugging, then it's just not for you. Still doesn't mean you can't have some kind of relationships with the people you talk with, maybe just not as fulfilling. Friendships requires for you to be there, for you to listen, for you to show compassion and sharing. You can do all that by writing, I'm sure.

But I think it's a totally different question when it comes to love affairs. Can you start loving a person you've never touched, hugged, kissed, smelled or banged? Can a relationship be deep without physical connection? I don't think so. You can be friends over the net, even romantic, maybe a little dirty too, but in the end, the love would be blind, deaf and a hanging torso. Even I, the touch-hater, need to be able to really feel the other person. I mean, what's the point if you don't get to do all the fun stuff too ;)

Let me sing you the song of my people

Today I want to come out of the closet and admit that I'm the guildleader of a pretty successful social guild. It happened by random events, and those I want to share you this time.

I don't remember anymore why and when Armi, Andra and me came back to Argent Dawn from Emerald Dream. I think it was because Emerald Dream was dead (and still is) and because we wanted to RP. We made two guilds at some point, one for RP and one as extra storage space. Armi had the lead in the RP-guild and I in the bank-guild. We RP'ed for a while but then it kinda dried out.

I wanted to seek out new adventures so I rolled a new character with the name I had used before in another MMO. So it was a female night elf with manly name Dannael. While questing I got a whisper: an invitation to this guild and the leader sounded so nice I decided to join. It ended up to be a zerg-guild (a guild that invites anyone and no one really gets to know one-another). I didn't like most of the people, only selected few, so I decided to leave the guild and ended up deleting the character. But in that guild people thought I was a guy because of the name and I didn't correct them. It was nice to be "Dan the man" and talk about equality to the point that one girl ragequitted because she didn't want to listen anymore of us pigs talk about how women's life should be. That was so much fun!

After Bloodrune - which is still alive and kicking, by the way, so hats off to you Rahazzan - I wanted to level my RP-character and I left Armi's RP-guild to go on new adventures. I, with Lucitar, was in Hellfire Peninsula when I got a whisper. It was this cute little dwarf that wanted my help with some PvP-stuff. I don't really care for PvP but that dwarf was so sincere I couldn't say no to him. I helped him and we chatted a bit. He talked about his guild and when he found out I was guildless, he asked me to join them. That's how I ended up in Adventurers Anonymous (or AA, like we altoholics call it).

AA had plenty of nice people and I really enjoyed my time there. Made some online-friends and had few laughs. I also became Luci (hence the name of the blog). But the guild was dying. The leader and his second in command came online less and less every week. My subscription was ending and I didn't have that much money so I told the nice people I was gonna be away for few days, maybe few weeks. When I came back after 10 days, the guild had broken down. Nobody was online anymore. It made me so sad to lose all those people.

I started to think what to do, what to do. I always wanted to give guildleading a go and so I thought I could try regrouping everyone in my guild. I didn't think they would, but I thought it was worth to try. So I mailed a letter in-game to all of the remaining guildies and told where to find me. Rennie was the first one to answer and he thought it was a good idea, so with his help we gathered the remains of AA in my bank-guild, Stop Inspecting Me.

First there was just the few of us and at some point we started to be afraid that the guild wouldn't last without new active members. So Rennie and I hit our heads together again and started to recruit. We didn't want many, quality over quantity was our motto, and we ended up getting some pretty good people to join our ranks. Now we don't even recruit anymore because people know how to find us, those who wants to giggle and take the game less seriously. With Armi on other and Rennie on other side, I now have my little guild that has a green chat (means we talk a lot. And I mean A LOT) and people really tries to get to know each other. I have no authority, but I think that is a good thing. We are all equal and at least I feel like every guildie can come to me with their in-game and outside problems. We've lasted quite long for a social guild too. It has been active since June.

If you're ever online and happen to be in Stormwinds trade district and you see a little gnome named Manypenny sitting infront of the mailbox, guarding it like a hawk, you now know the song of her people.

Funny side story to this is that I sometimes feel a little too much pressure being the leader so I go cheat my guildies with one other char and another guild. That guild actually is the best parts of Bloodrune. I've heard someone say I make a better leader than a guildie, and that might be true. So Pan (the leader of Falcon Hoof), if you ever read this, with all the love, thanks for tolerating my sarcasm!

(and the pic I have for the cover of this blog; that's actually Dannael)
Edit: Now it's a pic of Lucitar

Top five songs

Good morning world!

You know what day it is? Maintenance.

To celebrate this boredom I thought you might like some WoW-related songs. I think these are ones that you should have heard already. And if not, it's a perfectly good time to educate yourself. If you think I missed something, please be free and post a reply, I would love to get to know to more songs like these.

Here we go.

5. Warrior vs. paladin: the musical.

Quite witty video from an already excisting song.

4. Don't make me get my main.

Video is pretty boring (although I like the singing gnomes) but the song itself sounds pretty nice. Who doesn't like rusty and manly voice. *ladyboner*

3. First of May

This is NSFW but I guess that's why I like it. If you are ever feeling bit down, open this video and it's just impossible to keep pouting to the world.

2. I play WoW

This probably should be number one because it's so nice and polished. And witty. Also funny. So thanks Jace Hall for this awesome song and video.

1. Welcome to the Deadmines

This is the first song I even heard relating to WoW. I don't think I even knew what Deadmines was back then, I had played so little time. This could be little more polished, but it will always remain my favorite. Thanks Glar for showing it to me!

So there you have it :) I've been scheming up for a longer post but I think it's still so rare it needs to cook until next weeks maintenance. Play safely!

From an open window, you can hear music

The song of today is this:

It plays in my head and I do feel a little mad. Never before in my adult life has my window been so wide open for so long, and getting used to single life is becoming a bit of a pickle. I'm not saying I don't enjoy every moment of it, but it raises many emotions.

The good thing about being so messed up, as I am currently, is that I find new songs to enjoy. I thought I was so settled in my ways I could only like heavy/metal or the oldies but goldies. Now I have found myself expanding my musical range. I always thought peoples tastes changes because of age, but I think the taste varies with experiences.

My new experiences and feelings don't require wrist-slashing-heartbreaking-sorrow -music nor do they go well with ohh-I-know-this-song-let's-dance -music. I needed new kind of music to go with my new moods. One of my guildies made me listen to Blue Stahli, and I found myself liking it. I don't think I would have couple years back but now it hits hard.

Also one other friends of WoW made me listen to bunch of songs and he has totally different taste than I do, but we found "a common melody" with this song:

A song I never thought I could like. Does the same go with everything in life? I now start liking things I never thought I would? Like garlic, ewww!

A shadow

This was written on a sunny friday of 16th November 2012:

I was walking home from school when I bumped into an old schoolmate and her girlfriend. This particular girlfriend was shorter than people normally are and I noticed that her height bothered me. The rest of my way home I wondered why it made me feel so uncomfortable. I came to a conclusion, that it wasn't about her, it was about me. I always feel unsure around people shorter than me, were they ten centimeters or one meter shorter. I'm little short myself so I think being shorter than others is part of my indentity. That identity is shook when I'm around people whose eyes are lower than mine.

 Anyways, this girlfriend of my friend was very cute even though she kept looking me with an ebil eye. Did she look me that way because she could feel my uncomfyness and thought I was judging her or because she didn't like the fact that I knew her mate? - that I can't tell. I can only imagine how hard life is when you are only half the size of what normally people are. And how hard that life gets when your sexual orientation is also marginal. And stupid me went ahead and said something about my friends ex too... *sigh*

 If there ever is going to be a movie about World of Warcraft I could recommend that tiny girl for a gnome. Her big suspicious eyes where covered in make-up so they looked even bigger. Instantly I felt the urge to run home and play my gnomemage and enjoy the feeling of being small and able to blink. I wish one could be able to do so in real life too! Would help with the short feet and their limitations. And who wouldn't want some magic in their life?

 When I got home, I didn't play my mage but a monk. Two weeks ago I lapsed and bought MoP and I couldn't resist the urge to roll a new character. Pandas don't inspire me much but I've always liked the model of orcs - wonder why. I never really cared much about closed starting zones either and much rather quest in Durotar. Where there's easy access to Orgrimmar. And a barber. You know.

Little did I know they really are going to make a WoW movie. it's coming out December 2015 and I've already agreed to go see it with one of my gamemates. Can't wait!

More info here.

Shoop shoop

I'll start by this: when I woke up this morning, this was the song that played in my head.

You know when you click on a link in FB and end up looking videos in Youtube? And one video leads to another? And then maybe hours later you are looking at some video that has nothing to do with the original one? That happens to me a lot. Last night it happened again and I finally ended up looking at these videos about how does a guy know when a girl likes him.

"Does he love me I wanna know
How can I tell if he loves me so"

Women usually wants to know if the guy loves them but I think that is quite simple. If you feel like he loves you and he tells you that he does - problem solved - he does. But knowing that someone likes you is much harder. So I'm going to try to list few things I know I as a woman do, and also some of my friends have been seen doing. I'm not saying that these always apply or that even most women does these kinds of things, but they might be helpful for someone.

In no particular order, here are some tips how you can know if a girl likes a guy.

- She looks at you and when you notice she does, she might blush and smile, but she most likely begins to look at her feet. But she probably still keeps smiling, because seeing you looking at her makes her happy.

- She wants to see or makes excuses to touch your hands. I can't explain why, but this is what we girls do. She might want to see how much smaller her hand is compared to yours or foretell from your skin folds your future, most likely love life.

- She might try to hook you up with another girl to see if you like her back. If you refuse the "hooking up" she is more certain you like someone else and hopes it's her. This is also a way for her to try to know your preferences on a girlfriend or are you already engaged to another relationship.

- She plays with her hair, her ring, her necklace or anything available. She fixes her outfit or maybe even says something negative about it. That might be also fishing for a compliment. If you like a girl, don't be shy with the compliments, it can be something very small and menial, but if you show her you noticed something about her, she will like you even more.

If you're in the virtual world you might not see the girl if you don't video chat or things like that, but you can still see signs if she likes you. If she talks about sitting in front of the computer half naked or fresh from the shower, that can be a very good way to tell that she wants someone to think of her naked. She asks you when you are logging in or out. She might ask for your help with something she could do by herself. She sometimes takes the conversation to more private place, like whisper or private messages. Those are little hints you can pick up on. And I think we all should remember that even in text form, sincerity can be very loud thing. So don't be scared to say what's on your mind and ask questions you wish to get an answer to. One of those things could be "Are you into me?". Because you can't rely on physical aspects, you have to be more direct.

I also watched a video where this "relationship coach" told tips on how to make you seem more romantic to a woman and make dates memorable. The woman in the video was quite irritating and she made her case based on The Batchelorette, but she had some valid points. I can't find the video anymore since I hopped from one to the next, but what I remember is that she said there are little moments you can take advantage of to make the girl really remember you. One of those things was that if it starts to rain, you shouldn't look for shelter, but you should stay stand in the rain with the girl and kiss her.

Another thing was that if you are with a girl in a crowded place like someones wedding or something, you should make her forget about the rest of the world by stopping at some point, looking deeply into her eyes, say something nice like telling her she is the most beautiful person in the whole place and then kiss her. I know not all the girls fell for that kind of Hollywood-crap but I know I sure would.

And lastly, here is a pretty good video I stumbled on. These kinds of videos are for teenagers mostly but I can't say that they wouldn't apply for adults too. Romantic adults at least. Enjoy!

Bugs and booms

This was written on a Saturday 27th of October 2012:

I just had a fun time in a random dungeon. The tank DC'd in the middle and the rest of the party stayed to wait. That's rare even as it is but we talked a lot too. A shadow priest asked me to dance with her pet to get a screenshot. So there I was, posing in moonkin form with her little moonkin pet like for a tourist. Such a casual athmosphere sure creates a good mood.

When the tank returned, he made his apologies in the saychat that usually tells me the player is a noob, but I think his partychat might have been bugging. A guildmate of mine had that happen to him when his computer froze up in the middle of something and coming back online the partychat for somereason didn't work anymore. All this happened after the new patch. The chat will work after a while without any notice and we haven't yet figured out why.

 In that very instance an elemental shaman left the dungeon in the second room and the same thing happened in the last dungeon too. It's always so confusing when someone leaves without saying, but I like to think it's because an heirloomed shaman felt bad for losing to a boomkin in dps. And a shame it sure is because I'm usually in the bottom of that list.

One of my IRL friends have just started to play WoW and she has the weirdest bugs. Quests doesn't work, mobs don't trop loot, controls don't work, etc. I wasn't surprised about all the cursing when there's bugs on every finger. But bugs weren't my point here, it was the thought of what's the best first character for a new player. Last summer I said to a friend of mine that a druid would be a good char to be rolled. Afterwards I was sorry I've said that because it's not the most easiest with all the skills druids gets. So for a first character I would suggest a hunter. Or a rogue or a warrior could be good for they are easy at low levels. Would be nice to hear other thoughts about this, what do you think is the best character for one to start with? How about for a player that has played MMORPGs earlier but never WoW?

By the way, I think Blizzard is very smart with the customer service. For the first time ever I transferred a character from realm to another and it was said in battle.net that it usually takes an hour but one should be prepared for days for it to go through. 20mins later my character was good to go. It's good to be prepared for the worst and be positevily surprised when it's less.

 Now I have to get back to school work! That I obviously do while in a queue for a random :)

Sorry about all the typoes. There's something wrong with the spellcheck. Oh well, you'll just have to live with it. Or point them out to me.

The faire of the dark moon

This post was written on a Thursday 11th of October:

I find myself becoming increasingly worried about the situation the world is in. Especially the state Finland is in. I know it has to do with he upcoming elections, but I can't help but thinking that the things that are now brought up, aren't any less valuable for the timing.

I've read sad news about daycare and justice and others from the deep dark dephts of Internet. Facebook can be very depressing place if you keep clicking the most boring looking links. And you might actually have to think about stuff. And we all know how knowledge increases pain.

There's a proverb that states a sausage to have two ends and so has society: conspiracy theorists. Third end in this Fukushima sausage is the governments official publicity. So remember guys, what ever you read, take off those rose coloured glasses and put on your deep dark ones. Be critical and think for yourself. Conspiracy theorists can come across total whack jobs, but it doesn't mean that they don't know even a tiny bit of the truth. And if the officials seems honest, doesn't mean that they don't advocate someones personal interests. The question is, is it yours, your children's or your elderly parents interest too?

For making this little more casual and lighter, here's a link for that http://www.shakespearesden.com/disappearing-coffee-mugs.html Meanwhile when you in the future drink from the cups that makes dinosaurs into fossils and watch Night at the Museum, you can ponder is it alright to show historical characters understandable in modern standards. I'm pretty sure that we couldn't understand a person from hundred years and all their cultural behaviour. Or someone from even further in time.

What kind of comic relief was that all about! Apparently there are too heavy thoughts in the air to be light even in the end.

Happy DFM for everyone equally!

PS. Here is an inspirational music video from Killwitch Engage. 
Can one be charged for agitating the people if no-one reads the agitation?

Sometimes I feel like I only wrote the stream of my consciousness. Hopefully this will get better as we go along the year.

On a more serious matter

This was written on a Thursday 4th of October 2012:

I thought about writing about more serious matter today. I'll start with this: in the kingdom of Sweden slavery was forbidden since the year 1335. So this applied to Finland too. In the other words, explaining in plain, here where I live having slaves has been illegal for almost seven hundred years. Puts American history into a perspective, doesn't it?

Let us imagine the ancient Greek talking about putting an end to slavery. Great wise men would gather to talk about the matter in hand and there would be arguments for and against. Those men for ending it would argue about value of human life, equality and other ethical efforts. Those men against would be afraid for their living and also those who would be afraid the slaves would just end up being slaves for the barbarians if freed. They would say, that the slaves in Greece would have better quality of life so it would be better for a slave to be one in Greece than with the barbarians. This situation is totally hypothetical situation and exaggerated to the maximum.

Imagine how absurd it would be if anyone would argue that keeping slaves today would be a good thing or in anyway morally right thing to do.

Well, let us change "slavery" to "fur farming" and keep the conversation in today's perspective.

In Finland there's a collection of names for a citizen petition going on. With 50 000 names the parliament has to take the matter in the hearing for closing down the fur farming. This is been a debate in many places including with me and my friends. I can see the point of fur farming being someones living and loosing work is always a scary thing. I understand the point, that if fur farming is shut down here, the fur would be brought from some other country where the conditions for the animals could be worse. The point "here they at least get water" is very clear and not invalid to me.

But let us look at the bigger picture. Will it ever end if the ending doesn't start at somewhere? How can it end if  the western "civilised" countries don't see the importance of shutting it down? The animal can't choose to move somewhere else where fur farming is illegal. We don't really need fur at this stage of industrialism. We have other means to be warm, other fabrics that even looks like fur. Fur is a fashion product, not a vitality. Is there any good reason to keep the fur farming going on?
Don't get me wrong, I haven't yet signed the petition - lazy as I am. I also have my grandmothers godknowshow old fur hat that I'm not giving up. It's so warm and lovely, and I get cold so easily. And if I were to throw it away, the animal would have died in vain. Every day in Finnish frost I wear the hat thankful for it's purpose until it's too worn out to be worn. Reminding me that a living being has died for my comfort - probably in better conditions than today's...

That hat will most likely last from generations to the next. When I give it to my child in the future, I will remind him/her for those times there were slaves in Finland. Slaves that couldn't help build a better society and civilisation, but slaves whose carcasses hanged around rich peoples necks. Slaves whose lives where lived and wasted for nothing.

The petition got enough signs and now the government is trying to figure out a way to wiggle out of it. Let's see how it goes.

About pet battle

This is from 1st of October, 2012. I skipped one text because it was total rubbish not that this is any better. Here it goes:

Meow and rawr!

Best times to write in here is of course when your character is busy making netherweave bags. Some sillybeans were selling the cloth so cheap that I can make many, many, many gold pieces with them. With the new expansion, selling bagspace has been financially very beneficial, if you know what I mean. Can't complain even though MoP has brought up the bad in tanks. They're in so hurry to get to the end-game so it makes them run through dungeons and pull their asses off. And then there's me, trying to keep up with that pace and heal. It's good to remind yourself it's just a game when the tears start to make their way out of the eyes. And there's always the option to go get some rest and do pet battles.

If pet battling isn't that familiar yet, I really suggest to get to know it. It's good way to waste time when waiting for a random dungeon or a battle ground group to pop up. One of the best part of it that it's account wide activity, especially from the perspective of an altoholic. I'm not super excited about joining all the achievements and titles because there is less content to do. No point on grinding the main faction reputation now but just for the discounts. Never been so poor I needed to do that much work for that little copper. Grinding titles sounds like fun to me, grinding discounts sounds too much like real life. Who would want to go into a virtual world to do the same you can do outside in fresh (read: bloody cold) air, rain and darkness?

Ahem, trying to stay on the subject here. The old companion pets have turned into battle pets and with those you can take over the world battle by battle. You can battle with other players, NPC's or critterlike creatures in the nature. The battle pets in the world you can try to capture into your own collection - what I've gathered they get randomly a rarity, so you might wanna battle the same kind of pet until you get one with the blue rarity. You can only have three pets the same kind but you can always do a good deed and release the ones you don't need back to the nature. How humane, Blizzard!

 My first impression of pet battling is that it's quite simple but all the stuff around it might get confusing. I had ten horde balloons and another bunch of alliance balloons when the account wide combination came along. Too bad you can't battle with them, would be fun. If this is your first time with battle pets, I highly recommend checking out the quests. They really make things clearer and the rewards from them were fun. Especially an RP'er could enjoy the cookies that makes your pet double the size.

What are you staring at this anymore, go battle!

Something concrete

I know I said I would translate the finnish posts but today I felt like writing about something new. Yet again I'm coming out of a long relationship and preparing myself for the dating world. Because I'm in that age that usually people my age are married and had children and overall settled down, I keep wondering what it is that I want out of my next relationship. Dating would be so much easier if I had a list of what things to look for. I could freely enjoy the singlelife while looking for the spesific person and then pursue it when I do. Sounds simple enough? Wrong!

This is the "is it better" -game, that I play constantly in my head. They might be things that I never get an answer for. It's not exactly gaming, but let's play anyway. ("SO" is significant other btw ["btw" is by the way fyi ("fyi" is for your information)]).

Is it better to have your SO as passionate about something as you are, like music, or have one that let's you choose everything you two listen to? Is it better to find someone who likes something as much as you, let's say chocolate, or better to be with someone who can't understand why you like it and thus let's you eat it all?

Is it better to have a SO that farts in your face but doesn't mind you doing the same or one that can't stand polluting the air from either one?

I want kids so I think about should I have a SO that is younger and foolish and still believes everything will end up fine or an older SO who is sceptical enough to want other things from life than selfishness?

Is it better to have a SO so rich that there'll be nice life ahead of you or to have one that understands the struggles you've gone through and you can struggle together?

Are more intelligent people less passionate? Would it be good to have a little dumber SO who would be more open to feelings  than cold calculating brainiac? Could I ever be the smarter one in a relationship?

Is it better to throw yourself in the wind of feelings or stay grounded and check if your CV's of life matches with the person you are considering?

Does superficial things matter? And what are just superficial things and what are actually more significant?

Am I going to waste my time and at some point finally see that there isn't such thing as love after all?

Can a human being be 100% sure about anything?

And this question to show that not all of the things are even close to serious but they are still ok to be wondered about: Does it really matter how long hair the other one has?

I had a dream last night about a man who was caught having... umm... carnal relations with a beautiful woman and the husband of this blond beauty caught them and was furious. The men had been fighting for a while and the cheater was hanging from the balcony all beaten and bloodied. Both men were getting exhausted of all the fighting but the husband got strength from somewhere and started to beat the man hanging from the railing. He wasn't able to hit that hard anymore and the cheater could've make it if he just had hanged on a bit more. But he just suddenly gave up and let go.

And was smashed to the concrete road four storeys beneath him.

Wonder what Freud would say about that.

Mondays

It's maintenance day in the eu-realms if you're wondering "why doesn't this person have better things to do but keep posting crap here".

This was written on a Monday 24th September 2012:

Happy monday everyone!

...and it sure feels like one. You probably know the mornings when everything sucks and you just feel bad and depressed. If I could come up with a good reason to stay home and not attend to classes today, I would. Blah!

I was thinking that to celebrate the new expansion, I could reminisce some memorable moments of my wow-gaming-history. This also always makes me feel better when I'm down.

I remember the first day I started WoW. It was right before Cataclysm and I was moving from Runes of Magic to Azeroth. Few of my irl-friends showed me around and also all of their mounts and pets. That's just how it goes.

The first character I truly played was actually my third character. A troll hunter. I remember one time a guild recruiter answered my polite refusal, and it shocked me so much that I rode my dinosaur to a fountain. I ended up in the same guild, but sadly it got disbanded for hollow drama. So I kinda stopped playing that character.

I even had a twink once. A nelf hunter. With that character I had many fun times in BG's and random dungeons. I liked to play that char in BG's so that left my pet down in the flagroom and myself went to the roof and shadowmelted. Then I watched the minimap for incoming badguys and laughed at their surprise after they actually noticed something was wrong. I also like to drink an in-game drink that shows to the opposite side so they could thin "oh gawd, not that crazy hunter again". Once I also was the battleground leader for some mysterious chance and I was so proud of myself when I got the team to play together and leave the bickering behind. We won that match and some even thanked me, can you believe it! Another fun moment was when me and a holypaladin (who kinda took me under his wing) decided to go to the center to mess around. I didn't have much time to look what buttons I was pushing, just kept strumming the keyboard. The two of us could keep five-six players in that battle. A druid got the flag and a rogue kept our base, easybreazy! We won 3 to 0 and it might have been the fastest BG I've ever been.

One of the funniest moments happened few days ago when me and some other guildmates were doing random WotLK dungeons and a rogue happened to join the group. I think his head was lacking brains and instead filled with nutwax. At the last boss our tank was already so irritated that when this super hero ran to battle without us, we just stand by to watch him get the last rites. The rogue kept crying why we didn't help him and we tried to explain that he had misbehaved, but those who do don't ever want to hear that they do. Apparently, according to his words, we lost the best dps and all that crap. Surprisingly we were able to clear the boss without the rogue and in concert we decided to let the dead rogue think what he had done. The feeling of righteous judgement was filling all of us - and a tiny drop of remorse being so impolite not to ress.

Memorable was also the moment when I in an RP realm stumbled on two worgens, really close together, without clothes, on a very isolated cliff without talking or moving. Because I was on the horde side then, something possessed me I just couldn't help my self to jump around them for a little while. Childishness doesn't has no boundaries, right?

 I've been to dozens of dungeons where in have came and gone more than ten people only me being the one who started the actual run. I remember once telling to a newcomer what had happened in that run and he asked me to stop after a while because according to his words it was getting hard to play with laughter-tears in his eyes. (Too bad I don't remember anymore all the fun stuff that happened in that run.)

Once me with a goblin character participated in mass-world-pvp by cheering our side and hugging the enemies. Even thought it was fun too, maybe one day I will be brave enough to actually participate with a max level char to those events. These may seem ordinary events to most players, but I can't say I really remember those situations when something epic has dropped and I certainly don't want to remember doing the achievement for Ambassador right before the everything became account wide... That title doesn't mean anything anymore if it's on a low level character so total waste of effort. Best moments have been those when something an expected has happened and those moments I've enjoyed the most.

Have fun trying out the new pandas!

I did try pandas too and can't say they're my favourite race. They look awesome when I see them around the game moving so smoothly, but can't play one myself. Also I like that not every race and character has to be skinny and pretty. They can also be fluffy and cute. Like me.